Sleepy (September 25, 2006)

Lindsay fights slumber.
If not for espresso shots,
I would feel her pain.


When the lights turn off
I see dropping heads go down.
A video day.

to Nap or Not to Nap (September 18, 2006)

Every morning
I promise my eyes a nap ...
each day — a liar.


Surprisingly cold.
I wear my denim jacket
first time since may.


I pay the price for
irresponsibly long nights—
Lisa addiction.


Fingers inform me
I resolve to let them bet.
The air has gone dry.


I crack my knuckles.
Some people despise the sound.
I can tell which ones.


They think I take notes.
My writing hand gyrating—
This haiku becomes.


Through the blinds are trees
green and yellow twirling
covering the ground.


Every girls I see
I think about her naked—
Automatically.


Journalist speaker.
Such passionate examples
and "et-cetera."

Caribou-ku (September 16, 2006)

Large decaf mocha
skim no chocolate shavings.
—Drink evolution.


Skim turtle mocha.
Trying to stay skinny huh?
—Fifteen grams of fat.


Come to work groggy.
Ten caffeine doses later
still just as sleepy.


Low fat cinn chip scone
still has twenty grams of fat
false advertising?


Tall macchiato—
Unpleasant surprise coming.
Starbucks simpleton.


Do you serve Baily's?
Early morning, demanding booze?
I can't help you sir.

Work Sucks (September 14, 2006)

After opening
I sleep away my whole day.
Five hours of work.


A full parking lot …
People begin complaining.
Six in the morning.

Weekend Salvation (September 13, 2006)

A labor of love
replaced by gears and plastics.
Espresso machine.


Chicken McNuggets.
I can’t afford not to get—
six for ninety-nine.


After class I work
then tomorrow I open.
Weekend salvation.

School (Septemeber 11, 2006)

USB Flash drive.
UofM computer lab.
Make off with some loot.


I can see my breath
but sitting in a classroom?
Someone crank the heat!


Time for a new clock.
Every several years of wear
broken snooze button.

Thursday (Septemeber 7, 2006)

Surprised every time—
All of the ugly people...
Some of them by choice!


I have bought no books.
Teacher claims their importance.
Got enough firewood.


My thirtieth sneeze.
Running nose formed a puddle.
Allergy attack.

Worklag (September 05, 2006)

I am so sleepy—
When my eyes finally shit
I dream of sleeping.


Working an open...
It isn't in my nature
Steadfast night person.

Last Day of Summer School, Bit Late (August 4, 2006)

Lame presentations.
An Altoid keeps me awake
curiously strong.


A four-day headache
agitated by bad habits:
staying up all night.


We earn a free lunch
from the PermCoat company
—Can we order booze?

My Mind Past Midnight (August 2, 2006)

Car on a highway.
empty in all directions
speeding profusely.


A lifetime's thinking
can occur in just one night—
but to remember...


Sigh of surrender;
my eyes snap to attention.
I prepare some tea.

Mario Haiku (July 29, 2006)

The common koopa:
Mostly harmless to humans
Slaughtered for their shells.


Green spotted mushroom
grown in brick and mortar blocks—
second chance at life.


Floating marshmallow
He can't help the way he is,
the cutest undead.


Although uncreative
he has determination.
Kidnap the princess!


Professor Toadsworth
The princess's retainer
You know what that means.


FLUDD water device
Mario's swiss army knife
and comic relief.

Tough Wednesday (June 15, 2006)

Demand masonry?
Take your hallow threats elsewhere
Madrid will be mine.


Pulled an all-nighter
before a three hour class
—Civilization


In my morning grog
I hunt for a pop machine.
School of management.


Vault energy drink
seventy-eight grams of sugar?
Bottled heart attack.


Thirty minutes pass
before I realize
I'm not listening.


Very abruptly
puts on her denim jacket...
She must have noticed.


Ten minute break.
I ponder leaving early;
the angel prevails.

Summer Class (June 12, 2006)

Weeks of all-nighters
into a ten AM class.
I long for a nap.


Managment teacher,
she looks like a ball buster,
she probably is.


During the lecture
I resist checking the clock
Always a letdown.

River Falls (June 9, 2006)

amazon dot com
We hunt for hidden treasure
elusive goomba.


Late night excursion—
Under glowing street lamps
we share our feelings.


Digorno Pizza.
Every time we get tripsy
midnight snack of choice.


Lisa drinks me jokes
while I take shots of whisky
her jokes are tipsy.


Jamie not herself
Is it Ben or period?
I give it one guess...


Lisa writes haiku
who's quality threatens me
Good thing I love her.


Lisa wears no bra
I can tell by her nipples
My pants get tighter.

Underwear Shopping (May 23, 2006)

Underwear Shopping
at Frederick's of Hollywood:
Presents of Lisa.


Extra extra large—
Who would buy a thong that big?
Looks like no one does.


Robyn and Tina
Coordinated purchase.
Underwear sisters.


Hot days of summer—
even though the air is thick
toilet seats are warm.

Jaime and Lisa (May 18, 2006)

Pad Face eats Pad Thai—
is it cannibalism
or just irony?


Lisa and Jaime
dialogue tuns sexual.
Thai food restaurant.


Don't let your guard down
clubs and bars in the city—
cougars on the prowl.


Dr. Mario:
L knows pharmaceuticals.
J knows excuses.

Lisa's Graduation (May 13, 2006)

Eight pages of names
but only one with value
Our lovely Lisa.


Babies are cellphones
That can't be put on vibrate.
Leave them at home please.

Pink Slip (May 3, 2006)

Birthday week begins
on an unfortunate note.
Party on friday.


To the management:
I hope you get paralyzed
sooner the better.


If I had the power
to cause cancer with my thoughts—
UCS outbreak.


I lighted the load
with the help of liquor,
and a few good friends.

Load Off (April 26, 2006)

Final projects done
I feel thirteen pounds lighter.
Three tests remaining.


Out in a T-Shirt
I'm sick of it already:
Minnesota spring.


Pencil like a knife
Teacher evaluations;
I hold nothing back.


Brace for the river
Anything but a diamond...
—Seven of diamonds.

Bruno in Trouble (April 24, 2006)

My rebellious child,
expelled from the dog kennel—
Fight instigator.


I pick up Bruno
and take him to McDonalds;
double cheeseburger.


Bruno needs a bath
after the battle royal
I got one as well.

Domino's Pizza (April 21, 2006)

Quadruple seven
Domino domination.
Orgy of pizza.

Leaning Tower of Pizza (April 18, 2006)

The Leaning Tower
uncharted territory
--Celery pizza.


Hot bloody mary.
A flame kindles in my guts
--A spicy future.


Some drink after work,
sympathy for the absent:
gossip festival.


Justin's last week here
UCS without poker?
What a fucking beat!


Robyn and Tina
express thier lesbian love.
Boys with erections.


Bob and Tina chat;
clitoral conversation--
Happy to eavesdrop.

Passover (April 12, 2006)

I leave class early
under Judaism's guise.
Happy passover.

Nap Hunger (April 10, 2006)

Outside birds chirping,
excited about the sun,
wake me for my day.


Everyday in class
I plan on napping later
never follow through.


It's finally warm:
flaunt it if you got it girls!
-Way ahead of me.

Routine (March 29, 2006)

My bedtime thwarted—
friendly instant messages.
That's what friends are for.



Crossword-puzzle class.
the Minnesota Daily.
Lecture provides ambience.



Giant burrito;
double meat, guacamole.
Ten dollar monster.



Grey glow though my blinds
pissed off I do my routine.
Bike seat wet from rain.



My computer works:
harvesting information.
Fishing for torrents.

Doom III (March 23, 2006)

Zombie hamburger
Chain-saw ends their moans and growls
Trusty Beavertooth.



A zombie crumbles;
I scan through his PDA:
Dr. Frank Lamia.



I'd give my pinky
for a case of shotgun shells.
Mag-light lacks in range.

Blizzard (March 15, 2006)

Lonely stoplight
cycling though it's pattern
for a single car.



Poker mistreats me.
All statistics fall apart
when you're running bad.



As soon as snow melts
the clouds unleash punishment .
A ten-inch surprise.

Last Day 'for Break (March 9, 2006)

Queen of diamonds cries;
the diamond king unfaithful.
Slut—Queen of hearts


Dozing through classes
I look forward to coffee.
Make up for my loss.


Buttons on my coat
ponder their experience
with me—and before.


Low-life professor.
I try to pass the class-time
by wishing ill-will.

Hate School (March 6, 2006)

A gigantic mug—
too big for coffee or tea
perfect size for soup.


Multiple choice test,
like jigsaw word puzzle.
I am good at those.


Douche-bag manager
false sense of accomplishment
an enormous head.

I Hate School (February 22, 2006)

Less students in class
with each passing meeting.
Sand in an hourglass.



Going to bed so late
I only dream on weekends.
Weekdays are all "snooze."

Winter Still (February 21, 2006)

Heavy handedly
the winter proves it's presence:
Negative twenty.



A lurking vulture
frostbite follows me to school
as I ride my bike.



I punch in at work
a cup of tea and some jokes
some work on the side.



Cracking my knuckles
annoying for some, I know—
but I am addicted.



Awful professor.
if you have a heart attack
I wont feel bad.

Biking to School (February 15, 2006)

Miserable bike ride—
The frigid wind of needles
tries to steal my hat.



Bike to school each day
three years I attend classes
haven't learned a thing.



Another lecture—
sounds like Charlie Brown's teacher.
Each class is the same

Wednesday as aids (February 8, 2006)

Notebook goes missing
and all the haiku with it,
yet to be processed.



Frivolous lawsuit
iPods cause loss of hearing?
Common sense — gets raped.



Is he poor or rich?
My subconscious wonders
as I rake his chips.



A boy and girl flirt.
Makes me wonder if they know
how obvious it is.



The cold room gets hot
after three hours of class—
gyrating bodies.

Russian Class (January 25, 2006)

Russian saturation.
Half the class, native speakers
half americans.



High school portages?
Or just obnoxious natives?
Only time will tell.



Talk amongst themselves
I can't help but listen
Fein non-fluency.

iPod (January 23, 2006)

Girl in my classes.
I sit near her in them both.
One last semester.



I use my ipod
as I ride from class to class.
I fit right in.

Broken Watch (January 17, 2006)

My naked left wrist
is now a familiar sight.
Trusty watch— Broken.



School begins a new
as if it never ended.
I can't wait to learn.



The first day of class
six people already tardy.
I bet they get Ds.

Dress to Get Screwed Party (January 14, 2006)

Bra and underwear
everyone wants to do it.
I give an excuse.



Two dozen wet towels,
We resorted to laundry
to dry hot tubbers.