Out of Ammo

Found a cool article about the abundance of ammunition in video games. The comments are pretty interesting too.

Out of Ammo

Mass Effect 2, Impressions

I just finished Mass Effect 2 and I am ready to give my first impressions. I will just come out and say that this is probably the best RPG I have ever played. It's better than FF3, better than Chrono Trigger and better than Secret of Mana. There I said it. There are two main reasons this is so.

RPGs usually have two elements, fighting and plot/story development. Usually the plot/story development is the boring part. You need to read tons of boxes of static white text. Sometimes they try to spice it up and of course it helps if the story is compelling. Mass Effect's plot/story modes are the best part of the game. It is fun to have conversations and listen to the story. Mass Effect is fully voice acted, and when you are selecting which dialogue option you are going to choose it's only a 2-word summery. Basically you are choosing the attitude with which you will speak, and what Shepard actually says is a surprise to even you. So on your first play-through, you wont even have the opportunity to read what the other options are. This encourages a second play-through and still keeps it fresh.

The second reason, which is a genius BioWare invention (I think) is enemy scaling. Ever since I played Knights of the Old Republic I have loved this concept. It works like this, the enemies are scaled to your level to matter where you are. So you never have to grind to level up, and you never out-level the enemies to the point were the game is a cake walk. This allows the game to be really open-ended and allow you to complete the various story missions and side quests in any order you see fit and always have a healthy challenge. The is so good for reply value. Because enemies level up similar to you, higher level enemies have more skills and better weapons then low level enemies. So if you do quests in different order on your second play, you will encounter totally different situations. Parts of the game that you felt were easy will instead be hard because all of the sudden now the Krogans have incendiary ammo, or the Asari now have Shockwave.

Good and Evil in Video Games

If you fallow the RPG world then you are probably as sick as me of the whole "good or evil" paradigm. I haven't played every game but I have played some major ones. Primarily the BioWare RPGs (Knights of the Old Republic, Jade Empire, Mass Effect) and Fable. KOTOR was the first game I ever played (or so I thought) that allowed players to follow the light side or dark side of the force. I remember thinking it was kind of neat but my first character was light side for tradition's sake. Then I tried the dark side, I found it to be terribly boring and predictable. The most shocking was how little it effected the story. Since then I have payed close attention to games that implement this and I have hated it every time. It never makes any sense, and it does not make for interesting gameplay.

I remember reading an AD&D Dungeon Master's Manuel once that although it's possible to run an "evil" campaign, it is not recommended. The D&D fantasy world is meant to have a few powerful heros fighting hordes of evil monsters. These are pretty much the people who invented role playing. It just feels more natural to play a hero than a villain. The story is more believable and the writing can be more interesting. You want specifics? Very well, spoiler alert.

Knights of the Old Republic (KOTOR) as I said was the first game that let you be evil (or so I thought!) in this game you play a regular shmoe who finds himself in the middle of a Jedi struggle. You are rescued from disaster by Carth, a military pilot. You and Carth need to then rescue goody-two-shoes jedi Bastilla. Then the three of you escape the planet and you discover that you have the force. So the goody-two-shoes jedi train you to be a jedi. This game contains a light/dark side meter in the character screen. All the characters have one. When you do evil things like threaten people with bodily harm to get your way, or use the force to force people to do what you want you get dark points. Also some quests have two solutions the typical solution is logical and good, while the other is usually very contrived and maniacally evil. Here is an example that really stand out with me. In KOTOR there is a woman who lost her robot (C3-PO type) and she asks you to get him back. You find the robot in a field being attacked by some beasts. You can kill the beasts and engage the robot in conversation. There is a little more to it but basically your choices are "Come with me back to your owner" or "Kill him." Why would you kill this robot? What purpose does it serve to your agenda to kill him? Just blatant murder? Well i'll tell you why, if you murder him for no reason you get evil points, if you don't murder him, you get good points. See in this game, and all the BioWare games you are rewarded with evil points for committing evil deeds. The more evil you get the more evil quests are unlocked and the more powerful your powers become. But the evil acts are so poorly written it really dumbs down the plot of the game. Also when I first started going down the evil path I was excited thinking maybe I can join forces with the end boss, and have the ending play out totally differently. Nope the ending is the same. The only difference is, instead of killing Malak to stop him from destroying the universe, you kill Malak in order to take over his roll of destroying the universe. The game plays out exactly the same except for the final cutscene. Yawn. STILL! this isn't my biggest problem. My biggest problem is this, it doesn't make sense to the story of the game for the player to be evil. Your closest allies, Carth and Bastilla would NEVER allow you to commit cold-blooded murder. It would be like Han Solo and Obi Wan standing by while Luke Skywalker just cut down a bartender because he asked to see his ID. They would fight your character to the death instead of allowing him to threaten and murder people because you can look at both of their "Light/Dark" indicators and see they are both 95%+ light side! In the LEAST they would refuse to travel with you, and go thier separate ways. Which actually would make the game really cool. If you commit enough evil your allies turn on you and you have to fight them but no. They just chime in with "Using your force powers like that is on the path of the dark side..." Gee thanks Bastilla. The other funny thing about this game is, before you even get any jedi training, it's possible to build up a pretty solid evil reputation, so by the time you meet the jedi council you are pretty obviously evil, red-aura and all. The five jedi elders will still give you jedi training and give you a light saber and ask you if you "Understand the jedi code" to which you can reply "yes." "no." and my personal favorite "(Lie) Yes."

Jade Empire shares the exact same problems with truly good allies that stand by and do nothing as you insult and torment defenseless villagers. It also included contrived over the top evil quest solutions.

Mass Effect does a much better job. None of the "Renegade" quest solutions seem contrived or overly evil, and all of them can be justified with logic. I applaud Bioware for getting it right in this game. In Mass Effect you take the path of a Paragon or a Renegade, which pretty much means Captian Jean-Luc Picard or Worf style. It's like this, lets say there is a terrorist who has the remote control to a bomb in his pocket, and the bomb will kill 1,000 people. He is holding a woman hostage saying let me out of here or I will kill her. Worf would just shoot a bullet through the woman into the terrorist because saving 1000 people is more important than one woman. Jean-Luc would probably let him go and secure the woman's safety first and then find another way to stop the terrorist. This is a wonderful way to treat a game because you are never doing anything blatantly evil and out of character. You decide your preferred way of dealing with a truly interesting situation. However this game too pressures you to maximize your paragon or renegade points, and seems to dissuade you from playing a more balanced character. An unfortunate choice. It uses these paragon and renegade points to adjust your alignment and then rewards you with additional dialogue choices if you have acquired enough of these blue or red points. But only a finite number of these point are available total, so it's not possible to be granted all of the options without committing to one side. Also the paragon and renegade specific dialogue options are color coded blue and red (the colors themselves are tacky) and it makes the whole idea feel overly gimmicky.

The other game that really hyped it's morality choices is Fable. In Fable you go to a place called the Hero's Guild to train and gain missions. I guess villagers go to the Hero's guild and place requests for heros to help them stop giant beetles, or evil wizards. The weird thing is, bandit groups and criminals ALSO post requests at the HERO'S GUILD! Asking for help raiding towns and murdering villagers. Yeah that makes sense. All of the hero's guild emplyees, and the GuildMaster himself are clearly good guys, but they allow bandits to put in a mission called "Massacre Oakvale" how fucking stupid. The best way to become evil in Fable is just to go around murdering everyone you see for no reason. Being evil in Fable gets you horns and a demonic looking face and people run from you. Once again it has no effect on the plot of the game. The actual evil quests are totally shallow, and not all quests have evil solutions. Basically the evil path of Fable feels rushed, almost like a throw in. They should have just left it out. One of the problems in this game that makes it so shallow is the guards in the town can't stop you. You can walk into a town, murder all the guards and then have your way with the entire town. It doesn't even matter what level you are, the guards can't stop you. BioWare games do a better job with this, in those games you simply can't attack anyone in a town unless it's an activated event. So you can't just kill merchants. Fable doesn't have this balance and you can just go killing. I am fine with killing, look at my happy face when I am going on a spree in Grand Theft Auto. But in GTA if you get 5 stars on you, you are a goner. The cops will own you. In Fable you own the cops. Where is the fun?

It wasn't until I starting thinking about this stuff in depth that I realized there was one game that did it right. Fallout. I have never played Fallout 3, only the old school 1 and 2 so will be refering to those. There are several reasons why doing evil deeds worked in Fallout in a way it doesn't work in other games. I think the world itself is the best reason. It's a world that is mostly devoid of laws and doesn't have a strong sense of morality. The Starwars universe doesn't allow for any ambiguity, there are Jedi and Sith it's clear cut. Even Mass Effect has the galactic council and evil terrorists. In Fallout there is only your people, and everyone else. It's true that Vault 13 is an organized and civil community, but people on the outside world are savages and mutants. It's easy to consider yourself and your quest to save your vault more important then the petty laws of the outsiders. In Fallout you can deal with situations any way you see fit, for any reason you want, and no one is going to judge you. You can bust into the crime bosses building, kill all the guards and kill him just because you don't agree with what he is doing. You can even kill all the gamblers playing in his casino because you don't agree with that. You can join the crime boss and help him do some minor jobs, or you can help eliminate the law enforcement just because crime pays better and you need money. You can even work for the crime boss to gain his confidence and bring some hard evidence to the law enforcer to bring the boss down the legitimate way. The best part is, it doesn't matter! Nobody cares except for the immediate characters involved. You don't get a good/evil reward, just a feeling of accomplishment in whatever way you decided to do it.

Closed on Tuesdays (January 26, 2009)

Indian zombies
donning traditional garb
kiss surabhi's lock

groups of Indians
travel from their cars and back
frostbit parking lot

wasted lunch break
quest for Indian buffet
locked door doesn't care

After Christmas (December 26, 2009)

Day after Christmas
tired from the blizzard
snow falls lazily

Computerless (December 15, 2009)

Torn from a loved one
I stand lonely and alone
computerlessness


love expressed in hugs
I'm forced to restrain myself
else you will be crushed

"Throw in some plates will ya?"

Here is the policy at Umbria regarding plates. Our delivery charge is a meager $2 no matter how large the order is. Some people think that plates and forks and stuff are automatically included with orders. Sometimes that is the case, and other times it isn't. You need to be aware of how that works when you order, it's easy to ask about. So at Umbria for a "set" (plate and a packet that includes a knife, fork, napkins, salt and peppers) we charge thirty-five cents. It's not unreasonable. For just plates and napkins we charge fifteen cents.

Many times companies have a budget, say $150. They call and they ask us to work with them jamming as much food into the budget as possible usually this ends up with us giving them some kind of discount. We are fine with that for the most part. But when they set up the whole order, and hey are already getting 10-30$ off, the next day, they call and say "Oh yeah, throw in some plates and forks and stuff too will you?"

After explaining that those cost extra they get angry with me. They think they should be part of the deal "Other places throw them in." Well other places have a 10$ "catering fee" which we don't. You know you really can't win. If we charge a catering fee, then we got people bargaining with us to lower it if they only need napkins but not plates, or forks but not knives. I think our system is fine. The particular case, that ruined my morning today. The guy had 25 people and wanted just plates and napkins. That is an extra $3.75 to get it. Fifty foam/paper plates cost about $4 at the grocery store just to give you a scope of our profit margin on it. This guy decided to be a hardass and tell me how appalled he is that we would charge him for that when it should be included. Where the fuck does he get off? That's fine if he thinks that, but that isn't the case, it's not personal. I am already giving this guy 10$ off the order, so now I am just going to eat the cost of plates too? Why not "throw in" some deserts? is there some strange understanding that non-food items don't cost any money? Like we just have infinite plates and we don't care about them? So this guy has the fucking BALLS to threaten me with "I'm not in the mood to argue about it, but I am just going to have to take that into consideration next time I am ordering."

Yeah you take that $3.75 into fucking consideration. Fucking prick. We aren't even looking to make a profit on these plates, it's not like we are killing you with them. We just want to recoup our costs and maybe squeak out a TINY extra for our trouble. Officially ruined my morning.

Big Snow (December 8, 2009)

dozen accidents
Minnesota's first snowfall
always a surprise


snow falling sideways—
playing Donkey Kong Country
I hear winter themes

Forced Re-inspiration (November 25, 2009)

middle of the road
squirrel considers options
indecisively

Snow (December 3, 2009)

My most hated chore
empty Parmesan shakers
winter's first snowfall

Lazy Monday (October 19, 2009)

vertical blinds
made transparent with sunlight
box elder shadows

Gloom (October 21, 2009)

grey horizon
kept interesting by rain
starting and stopping

Drizzle (October 1, 2009)

two full cups of tea
by the espresso machine
—soon to be empty

Snowfall (October 13, 2009)

outside — a snowfall
inside steam wafts from my cup
how appropriate

Cold (September 30, 2009)

cold air on my face
inhale the smell of winter
exhale foggy breath



an empty highway
your aroma rides along
I miss my exit

Imported Japanese Porcelain Cup (August 21, 2009)

expensive tea cup
improves the flavor of tea
—money well spent


flirt with Emily
she ignores me completely
her way of flirting


drinking tea outside
I rarely experience
the chirping of birds

Night (September 29, 2009)

wonders of the world
comfortably from my home
the travel channel

Rain (August 20, 2009)

grey clouds motionless
lush trees dance in cool air
the smell of rainfall

Lunch Buffet (August 5, 2009)

a busy morning
buffet piglets leave their tracks
one thousand dishes

Rain Dance (July 24, 2009)

another Friday
searching for comfort in tea
the first of many

Happiness and Hope (July 28, 2009)

bathing in sunlight
two patio umbrellas
provide shade in vain

Emo (July 19, 2009)

overindulgence
every pizza tastes the same
—that much parmesan


other peoples kids
I wish I could discipline—
with an iron fist!

Kids (July 17, 2009)

children riding bikes
super-soakers strapped on back
ready for battle

July (July 2, 2009)

Spam and pineapple
pizza of my fantasies
—a reality


underwater race
a beautiful nose—broken
but still beautiful

Family (June 30, 2009)

indecisive mother
not hungry for anything
—but always sushi


Russian family
Italian restaurant
—sushi for dinner

Rain (June 25, 2009)

a beautiful store
filled with ugly customers
—I should be thankful


another bad mood—
I used to be so cheerful...
only a women

Sunshine (June 10, 2009)

when we meet again—
eagerly I count the days
of this rainy week

gaggle of models
the most beautiful is mine
bathing in sunlight

Warmth

a spiteful stoplight
faces of those around me
they feel what I feel

June

Parmesan refill
How quickly shakers empty
—Passage of time

Another Friday (May 22, 2009)

that fated wedding—
I hoped I’d never forget
your beautiful face


approaching summer
the temperature of my tea
makes the day seem cool


clouds obscure the sun—
laughing at the sad attempt
the sun shines elsewhere


day filled with bird chirps
complaining about the heat
I know how you feel


birds tweet in nature
under air conditioning
I am tweeting too


every thought of you
soothes the bitterness away
a drop of honey

First Mosquito (May 13, 2009)

inside drinking tea
just recently I notice
the thunderstorm

my amazing bed—
already sleeping in it …
soon my dreams come true

a lone mosquito
doesn’t have time to regret
—the first of many

I fucking crushed him
before he knew what happened
the first of many

underneath make-up
hide more layers of beauty
to infinity

Anticipation (May 12, 2009)

Out of Tabasco
Another bottle purchased
Mexican workers


Familiar tea
Pulses of dinner traffic—
Where are they eating


My mother’s stories
A trouble-making baby—
I apologize


An occupied mind
Re-arranging furniture
Soon to be my home

Friday— (May 8, 2009)

a dribble of milk
changes the flavor of tea
the day is gloomy


incessant complaints
a fly buzzing in my ear
—working with mother


Friday dinner rush
Almost breaks me into sweat
Just out of practice

After-Birthday (May 3, 2009)

parmesan shakers
conspicuously empty
lack of customers


freshly-washed bed sheets—
never underestimate
the soothing power

Friday (May 1, 2009)

bad economy
forgotten by media
thankful to swine-flu

another birthday
a superfluous excuse
to see Emily

a bleaching mishap
after a dozen washes
—My hands smell like bleach

refills of water
drink without satisfaction
a salty sandwich

I Am So Graceful

I just realized something today—

In my entire food service career, I have never had any kind of traumatic accident. I have never dropped a large tray of food. I've never dropped any kind of pasta or burger in the kitchen. I have never spilled anything on a customer.

I am just like a figure skater out there.

English Class (Circa 2003)

The girl sitting next to me
She is very pretty I can see
But I wonder, can she hear?
With seven piercings in her ear?
“Fox”

Clumsy clumsy teacher is
Giving us a silly quiz
Every day he breaks the chalk
Obsessively I check the clock
“Balloon”

Behind me sits a regular bloke
Always ready to give a dry joke
He might as well stand up and cheer
“I love football, pizza and beer!”
“Reg”

The girl in front of me exposing her thong
I thank her for letting me stare for so long
She’s very stupid I always thought
But there is no doubt that she is hot
“Babe”

The boy behind me kicking my chair
I am about to pull out my hair
If he hits it one more time
I will commit a heinous crime
“Troll”

The disgusting kid who never talks
Always wearing the dirtiest socks
Worn out sandals on his feet
Hey kid, take a shower that would be sweet
“Grease beast”

Just another day in English class
I only learn to let time pass
Looking forward to when it’s done
It’s not so bad, time flies during fun
(Sigh)

Rain (April 29, 2009)

single lost women
asks a dozen bus drivers
—miss-matched directions


White Castle breakfast
worse than I remember
rainy spring morning

Work Musings

Guy walks in, asks me what is on the buffet. I show him him the pesto rigotoni with italian sausage, penne with artichoke hearts and mushrooms, linguini with chicken and sun-dried tomatoes and spaghetti. Is there pizza on the buffet also he asks? Yes, we have pepperoni pizza, sausage pizza, and alfredo chicken with tomato.

"Looks like too many carbs. Thanks anyway."
"... alright (This is a fucking PIZZERIA DUMBSHIT.)"

Friday Night Blues (April 24, 2009)

friday evening
few patrons participate
all of them ugly

two mature adults
leave a mess like toddlers—
disgusting piggies

non-paying patrons
pissing on my toilet seat
I’m gritting my teeth

greasy fingerprints
I only like children
when the slip and fall

lipstick like a clown
the mirror in her bathroom
—probably broken

ugly family
“buffet art” on their clothing
like father like son

A Slim Chance at Happiness (April 20, 2009)

all in on the flop
drawing to a royal flush
versus a full house

a rainy monday
expecting to hear crickets
—unpredictable

fifteen minutes pass
indecisive customers
—ham and cheese sandwich

I Hate Friday (April 17, 2009)

friday evening
it’s never busy enough
but still exhausting

forgotten tea cup—
I remember after three
where I had left it

potential visit?
possibility of her—
brightens my weekend

so many sunsets
I’ve come to appreciate
empty dining room

full brown paper bags
not from the grocery store—
busy liquor store

second I relax—
dash to get the telephone
telemarketer

Emily’s absence
facebook loses it’s appeal
—just HTML

A Cranky Gentlemen (April 15, 2009)

every phone call
brings me closer to anger
hate all the voices

a true summer day
our patio is ready
in use by no one

excited to see
how badly she will hurt me—
this girl of my dreams

iced tea with honey
my summer-time fixation
I am still sweating

another pay day
one step closer to my house
Zeno’s Paradox

Boredom (April 6, 2009)

coffee versus tea
two hours spent deciding
getting sleepier

shot of espresso—
hypnotizing steam escapes
until its all gone

parking lot shadows
sunset manipulated—
stretch and disappear

Tuesday (March 31, 2009)

Tuesday
(March 31, 2009)

cookies with my tea
I consume the whole package
seven cups of tea

perfectly fine day
ruined by a thunderstorm—
a mother’s shouting

day of flared tempers
cumulonimbus relief
I welcome the rain

44 Tea Cups (March 26, 2009)

horizontal snow
driven by bitter wind
—Industrial windows


three empty tea cups
scattered on my makeshift desk
full cup in my hand

Sunday (March 22, 2009)

enormous salad
guilt of wastefulness consumes
unhappy stomach

Monotony (March 21, 2009)

snow on parking lots
a satisfying salad
obliterated

Grey (March 20, 2009)

angry and sleepy
everything is overcast
tea isn’t helping


miniature cookies
Why did I take so many—
to only eat one?


empty restaurant
Ipod plays my radio
heard it all before


four teaspoons sugar
my mood shows no improvement
rain begins to fall

Relief (March 8, 2009)

well-crafted sandwich
look forward to consumption
fully-stocked deli


a perk of the job
the industrial kitchen
never leave hungry


daylight savings time
all my clocks are incorrect
except my cell phone

Frustration (March 7, 2009)

a shot of vodka
desire to consume
time is never right

Restlessness (March 5, 2009)

single customer
four employees to serve him
—excellent service


non-existent lunch
a shit box economy
The ship is sinking

Sadness (March 4, 2009)

same tea as always
but more bitter than before
a cry of lament

Onions (February 28, 2009)

my father and me
sharing teary-eyed laughter
onion therapy


an annoying cold
ambitious remedy—
slicing the onions


carefully laid plans
I beg your understanding
virus saboteur

Blizzard (February 26, 2009)

darker and darker
finally the sky breaks
—another blizzard

glimmer of springtime—
smothered by malicious snow
a spiteful winter

Burger King (February 16, 2009)

Burger King coffee—
Notably low quality
Makes it delicious



Collection of crumbs
Agitating me all day
They won’t clean themselves

Umbria Tuesday (February 10, 2009)

One tea, three sugars
Overcast wednesday breakfast
The first of many


Tea experiments
Black pepper basil infused
Exotic flavor

Umbria Monday (February 9, 2009)

Raspberry lemon
Defeat boredom of monday
Tea experiments


Thirty days of work
A real-time strategy game
  —No pause button

Passage of Time (February 8, 2009)

My strong cup of tea
Becomes stronger every day
Awaiting springtime

Shower (January 28, 2009)

A shower’s whisper
The answer to all questions
—In the water’s sound

Work Musings (January 26, 2009)

Pile of dry tea bags
One more added to the group
The passage of days


Empty sugar bowl
Too lazy for a refill
The passage of days


Empty sugar bowl
Too lazy for a refill
My tea sits without

Below Zero (January 8, 2009)

snow and salt dusted
car frozen to the driveway
battery is dead

Work Musings (January 5, 2009)

Realized too late—
Stranded in a timeless world
Forgotten wrist watch


My nine-pound jacket
Donning winter armor
Preheating the car


Spamming coffee
My fifth cup in an hour
—I don’t like coffee

Why I Love Winter

It's fall. That means it's cold and winter is coming. I am a huge fan of the winter for four reasons which I am happy to share with you right now. The cold air is clean, I get to wear my badass jacket, I get to keep food in my car, and the nights are longer.

You know how parents and grandparents are always saying nonsense like "Wear a coat or you will catch a cold?" Some kind of old barbaric belief that actually being cold is what causes you to catch a cold? Well the opposite of that is true. Germs can't flourish when it's 10 degrees outside, the same way they don't do so well in your fridge. When you walk outside in the wintertime and take a deep frosty breath you can rest assured than you are not inhaling any germs or allergens (well maybe SOME germs).

Speaking of coats. I happen to have a very badass jacket that weighs nine pounds. But it's not just wearing it that makes me like the cold. It's because when I have to put on a coat I have pockets! I love having pockets. I hate having to keep my car keys in my pants. Especially with these stupid fat plastic keys I have for my Passat. They are like keys for a toy car you buy at TOYS'R'US. They are HUGE! and you need two of them to make the car work. I have some other keychains and stuff on it too so it's a huge pain in the ass! I love just leaving that pile of shit in my coat pocket and not having it effect my life.

I mentioned food in my care. What am I talking about? Well you ever try to keep a Snicker's bar in your car during the summer? I bet you know what I am talking about, that candy bar is ruined. Well in the winter time, you can keep whatever you want in your car and it wont rot or melt. I am mostly just talking about candy like Three Musketeers bars, and Snickers. But it even works with beef jerky. If it gets REALLY cold than the stuff will actually freeze, and you get the pleasure of eating frozen M&M or jelly beans on those long care rides. Check it out.

Finally, the long nights. This one is very simple. I am a horrible sleeper. I often go to bed very very late. By late I mean 6AM. Because I am such a fragile sleeper, the sun coming into my room disturbs me further. When it's winter and the sun doesn't rise until 10AM then I have a much easier time sleeping. Which I like. I used to hate it when I was little because I could only play outside until like 5:30PM, but I don't play outside anymore so I don't care about the night. I just want the sunrise to be later.

According to Dante's Divine Comedy the eighth and final layer of hell isn't actually a place full of fire but of ice. It's a large frozen lake in which the sinners are trapped, frozen up to their necks. Interesting how this presents cold as the worst place to be. Part of the conspiracy to convince the world that summer is a preferable season. Non-sense I say.

Jogging (October 4, 2008)

the treadmill each day
how many miles have I run?
destination abs

Trying to Sleep (September 30, 2008)

always about her
my mind will not stop racing
"her" is one of three

McDonalds 8:00AM (September 25, 2008)

in early morning
everything is unpleasant
except McDonalds


“deluxe breakfast”
all you need for happiness
less than five dollars


McDonalds coffee
not award-winning flavor
comforting flavor

Wario Land: Shake It

A very clever and impressive advertisment for the new Wii Game.

http://www.youtube.com/experiencewii

Many World Kaizo Mario Lvl 1

Check out this video.

http://msm.grumpybumpers.com/?p=20

It is a run of the first level of the Kaizo Rom-Hack of Super Mario World. He overlays all of his attempts into the same video, so you can see all the deaths, but not waste any time! I wish he did the whole game like this.

Sweere Wedding Haiku (September 13, 2008)

love-locked in a gaze
joyous couple holding hands
no hole left untouched

5:59am (August 16, 2008)

sun already up
awake I lie restlessly
classical music


writing on empty
no muses left in my life
—just a snoring dog


with the rising sun
light seeps into my house
every orifice

SNES Cravings (July 24, 2008)

Sometimes I get the craving to play certain SNES games. I remember how much fun I had beating the last boss. Even though I am fully equipped and capable of satiating these cravings and actually playing the game. I usually go download a speed-run of the game, and watch it. Today, I craved Turtles in time.

Only one turtle
Eight hundred dead foot soldiers
Splinter would be proud

Only one turtle
Eight hundred dead foot soldiers
Shredder grinds his teeth

Life - (Work + Sleep) = Zero (June 27, 2008)

Fourteen hours at work
Nothing to look forward too
nightly cup of tea


plenty of money
not a moment to spend it
only half a life

My New Sister (June 11, 2008)

sharing our boredom
doesn't make it go away
mariya and I

16 Hour Day (June 10, 2008)

Work before sunrise
Installation was delayed
Espresso machine

Overseeing Construction (June 3, 2008)

strip Mall Patio
passing pedestrians stare
greeted with a smile


hideous people
patronize the mini-mall
—future customers

Umbria Construction Site (May 28, 2008)

A missing ladder
Insulation guy curses
It was fiberglass


work to meet deadline
plumbers and electricians
In each other's way


army of tradesmen
experts in respective fields
each tool-belt unique

Sunburn (May 18, 2008)

birds chirp in the wind
grass and trees drink the sunlight
—my skin burns badly

Mayo Clinic (May 14, 2008)

waiting lobby
In many ways an airport
—with constant delays



six hours have passed
only one haiku written
my third waiting room

Sunshine (April 20, 2008)

clear sky sun shining
summer finally begins
I waste it indoors



the poker table—
Attracted to the green felt
like a moth to fire

Snow (April 10, 2008)

friendly spring sunshine
oppressed by grey cloud-cover
another snowfall

Calzone (March 24, 2008)

Unidentified
calzones beg many questions
a surprise inside

Birds (March 10, 2008)

This morning birds chirp
forgotten buy familiar—
pleasant melody

Anger, Spite and Malice (March 05, 2008)

Frustrating snowfall
makes me more miserable
No one likes wet socks


Each day I'm rotting
mentelly and physically
"Marketing" "training"

Winter Wasteland (February 18, 2008)

clear skies and sunny—
snow and salt covered ground
three below wind-chill

Not a Morning Person (February 17, 2008)

seven wake up call
I prepare for my workday
round peg square hole



buried in my work
saves me from unhappiness
little time to dwell

"Training" (February 6, 2008)

Hour early traffic
I pull into parking lot
nightmare just begins


"training" without pay
I give thirty weekly hours
straight exploitation


as noon approaches
people become more friendly
maybe just hungry?

Voyage Home Sweet Home (January 25, 2008)

even the airport
my headache wont go away
slot machine noises


Mallory-go mode
deftly she skates tab to tab
I admire her butt

Gambling (January 22, 2008)

smokey poker room
I sit reluctantly
lose predictably


seek comfort in food
the Bellagio buffet
got my money's worth

Mountains (January 21, 2008)

layers of mountains
cut the horizon jagged
clouds climb over

Touchdown Vegas (January 20, 2008)

two hours backward
fifty degrees warmer
touchdown in Vegas


hundreds of people
crank slot machine handles
unhappy faces

Green Mill Goodbye (January 15, 2008)

trickling patrons
they complain about slowness
relaxing, I smile


a friendly greeting
suggested appetizer
—no acknowledgment

The Battle (January 8, 2008)

common cold syndrome
nothing a sauna can't fix
two hundred degrees


each room in the house
contains a stale cup of tea
I still have a cough

House To Myself (January 3, 2008)

night of boredom
I look to my buddy list
forecast is Sunny


chatting with Sunny
brightens the darkest of nights
five in the morning

New Year, Not Fucking "New Years," not even "New Year's" (January 1, 2008)

dozens of poems
a folder made of pixels
take up zero space


conversation—
it's what she didn't say
that crushed my spirit


I propose a toast
new year resolution
"old friends and new loves"

Russian Christmas (December 25, 2007)

automatic watch
what makes it valuable
is what makes you frail


Christmas snowfall
Father hands me a present
a well-worn shovel

The Quest for Abs (December 19, 2007)

determination
jogging not for travel
but for exercise


many things don’t change
given enough commitment
I’ll develop abs

Tea (December 3, 2007)

new brand of tea
old familiarity
gets cold so quickly


despite my effort
occupy my time and mind
think of her often


Halo regimen
pure pwnage during gaming
sit-ups during load


days pass so quickly
without any excitement
strangely, i don't mind

Fog (November 19, 2007)

thanksgiving comes
no reason to celebrate
without my Lisa


suffocating fog
objects render out of grey
like playstation one

Sucks (November 16, 2007)

day after day ends
filled with monotony
forward to nothing


port forwarding
virtually an art form
a winters midnight